THROUGH MEN’S EYES. Marriage is not all rosy. Some individuals such as Betty Kamugira, founder Women of Valour, have come up with remedies for the institution as DERRICK WANDERA explores.
In purple garbs, couples stood arm-in arm last Saturday evening. To mark their 10th anniversary, Women of Valour (WOV) held a dinner at Aagan Restaurant on Lugogo Bypass, Kampala. To match the theme, creating and sustaining Godly marriages and family units, men shared their experiences about how their marriages have changed since their wives started attending the WOV meetings.
When Henry Wanyama, NTV Kitchen Delight show host married his wife close to two years ago, everything seemed improper in his marriage. His tidy personality seemed not to match his wife’s independent and feminist personality. Wanyama says sooner or later, his wife started attending WOV meetings. Behold, things started getting better.
“Whenever Zaitun attended the meetings, I was assured of a good one or two weeks of tranquility and sweet treatment in the house,” says Wanyama adding that he is now proud of his marriage because with time, things have completely changed and he attributes all the change in his wife to the organisation.
Better kitchen and bedroom skills
“There are many things that have taken shape in my own house, Joan can lack anything but not fuel to a WOV meeting in Namugongo because I will be the one to benefit from the outcome. From nowhere, you see new charming things from the kitchen to the bedroom including the look of the living room, “confesses Gerald Isabirye.
Isabirye hails the women for their invention of terms such as ‘lego’ (meaning making a man happy in bed) which have gotten the men dancing on their toes. “Your new terms have vehemently won our hearts, keep it up,” he says.
Women with solutions
Pastor Joshua Mugabi, one of the counsellors and key note speaker at the dinner says families have been restored and he is happy for the women who have committed themselves to solving their issues.
“Issues of women can be complex for us men, but when women decide to take the bull by the horns, then that is impressive. Our marriages will not face any kind of dogma, issue-solving or crumble and I have seen most of these being solved here in WOV,” says Pastor Mugabi.
Betty Kamugira, WOV co-founder, says many women have come to the group to bid goodbye to the members before they call it quits to their long marriages, but by the time they get home, they are ready to give it another shot.
“We don’t stop at praying for the couples but we give counsel to the marriages and especially the women and men have always confessed the outcome is worth celebrating, that is why we are here today,” said Kamugira of the evening.
Why the dinner?
The dinner got the women thanking their men for allowing them to attend the meetings and reflect on their achievements since the inception of the organisation.
“This dinner is perhaps the only chance we get to come together with our husbands and show them the group members with whom we meet,” says Joan Isabirye.
The annual event was organised to give an update of plan and get the men on board.
“Our husbands get busy with work and in most cases we want to get them involved in our activities. In a time like this, some of them make contributions to us that see us moving as an organisation,” explains Kamugira.
• Betty Kamugira, co-founder Women of Valour saw a need among the newly married women. With naïve women fresh from university and entering the marriage institution, it was challenging for them to cope with the whole new venture. Visiting a friend who had also gotten married, Kamujira tabled the idea and since 2007, the organisation has been baking.
• They have stabilised more than 100 marriages and many soon-to-be brides learn how to take care of men, submit to them and deal with issues that would otherwise have had families get broken.
• “Through prayers, counselling and general involvement in family life, we focus on grooming middle aged corporate women to know how to match and balance their careers and their families,” says Patricia Egwalu, a mother of two.
• “We have counsellors and people from different walks of life within our 60 members who can help in talking to our fellow members with a problem. We fund ourselves with a subscription fee of Shs10, 000 per month,” notes Kamugira.