In Summary
  • That hope comes in a giant tent called Edward Ssekandi, otherwise titled Vice President of the Republic of Uganda. No NRM actor perhaps embodies silent scandal more than he does.
  • Now Ssekandi is a learned friend who might take issues with us and sue, meaning we will be compelled to explain our utterances by way of defence. As long as Bamugemereire won’t be the judge, then we can explain things right here before Ssekandi even dreams of suing.
  • Does Kadaga want us to first draft a ten-point programme on why she should call for Ssekandi to be relieved of his duties?
  • Why should a man who can’t even visit a shrine or womanise like his predecessor be allowed to continue drawing salaries by false pretence? In this land, the people are used to loud and noticeable scandal. If Ssekandi can’t give us one, he should go.

The one thing synonymous with our dear NRM leaders is scandal. Even those not subscribed to the party but who are given opportunity to work within its ambit will always find a way around this thing called scandal just to fit the bill.
Have you noticed how Lady Justice Catherine Bamugemereire is trying too hard to be another Julia Sebutinde to the extent that she is now more scandalous than Beti Kamya’s eyebrows?
But not all is lost. In fact, there has been an ember that has been slowly smoldering into life, giving some specter of hope.

That hope comes in a giant tent called Edward Ssekandi, otherwise titled Vice President of the Republic of Uganda. No NRM actor perhaps embodies silent scandal more than he does.
Now Ssekandi is a learned friend who might take issues with us and sue, meaning we will be compelled to explain our utterances by way of defence. As long as Bamugemereire won’t be the judge, then we can explain things right here before Ssekandi even dreams of suing.

Wait, there is nothing to worry about. The man is so annoyingly pious that sometimes we think he offers his blood to mosquitoes just so the malaria transmitting things are not starved. But there is no way a man can go around carrying himself like an abandoned tent without anyone noticing but getting paid for it. Huge monies, mark you.
The last time Ssekandi tried to fit in the NRM aspect of scandal, he did two things: First, he turned up in slippers at Capitol Hill or somewhere close, standing in an official photo with President Barack Obama.

At the time, Obama was planning to tour of Africa and like Clinton before him, this Democratic leader would follow the tradition and visit Uganda. Obama eventually didn’t come to Uganda. He stopped at Kogelo, the birth place of his father.
Then there was this time the man we honour as vice president decided to appear as the first news item on a UBC bulletin.
To get noticed, he envisioned journalists as some bees and decided to look like a flower, turning up in a court of many colours for the State of the Nation Address. Of course, he earned his fat salary at the end of the month as you people went about sketching his weird outfit on social media.

And now, for all we care, the NRM government is seeking to give Ssekandi Shs10m per day for every time he exits our borders to do things no one will ever notice. If the VP stayed out of the country on a tour for just 10 days, that is Shs100 million to his person alone. Then his entourage.
Some say it is his job description to rema
in inconspicuous so as not to challenge his boss’s dominance of the political scene. And we ask, why shouldn’t his boss just scrap the office and life goes on?

We are used to guys grabbing land and when challenged, they release huge guard dogs on the claimants.
There was this time when some weirdo who joined the revolution around Nakulabye when, ensconced at Nicodemus Pork Joint, he heard gunfire as the NRA occupants were capturing Kampala. Torn between fleeing and being captured, he joined the guys and became so powerful that he could afford to set a tractor ablaze when some land claimants dared raid his farm.
Then there is this one who has been renting a public gallery for free. I hear someone who leads a mere hecklers and eaters club in this land has been ordering the man to pay the rent and vacate the gallery.

Does Kadaga want us to first draft a ten-point programme on why she should call for Ssekandi to be relieved of his duties?
Why should a man who can’t even visit a shrine or womanise like his predecessor be allowed to continue drawing salaries by false pretence? In this land, the people are used to loud and noticeable scandal. If Ssekandi can’t give us one, he should go.