WHAT IS YOUR ROLE? Some men want their wives to do anything and everything while their counterparts think it is fair to share responsibilities, writes DERRICK WANDERA
Acertain section of men around town subscribe to the modern dream husband. They take the pleasure in seeing the children to bed and waking them up to prepare for school, doing the dishes after dinner such that there is little for them to do in morning.
They would not mind calling their wives for a warm bath as they put together what she would wear to work before he tucks in.
Another group is the one a woman would say to, ’that is how men are’, he is happy to beckon on mama baby when he finds a child messy, wakes up and expects a hot mug of tea on the dining table, but heads for the warm shower in the bathroom as the wife cools the tea. He would actually call his wife to direct him where his socks are and also tell her to call the maid to rush and pick the children from school. Andrew Sembatya, a boda boda rider in Kisenyi believes, those are the roles of women at home and that is why he wouldn’t do them. Sembatya does not make the list alone, he contributes to the endless list of men that have their roles stipulated differently from the women’s and they would never cross the line.
Foot the bills
Today I met a man, probably in his mid20s; he is calm and speaks with decorum. He says his duties are clear as a newly wedded groom fathering, Douglas, a son. He has to serve customers in the shop and his wife taking care of Douglas because his part is to take care of bills. ”I cannot be bathe the children when my wife is there, what is her work? I was prepared before my wedding!” retorts the shopkeeper.
Brian Waiswa, 34, a pharmacist in Kisasi, says Busoga culture dictates that a woman is supposed to be a home-keeper and the man is supposed to be the hunter. “Growing up, our mother was bathing us and doing kitchen work, that is what we have learned to be and it is what do even now. Only that today things have changed women also fend for the entire family,” reckons Waiswa.
Peter Musana, a photographer, believes men have a bigger task to account for the family than the women. He says child delivery is for the women and nobody can change that but for men, you have to make sure that as the woman is in the labour ward, she eats and so does the child that is where a man would be challenged.
However, Lurry Onyul, a teacher, says “some roles such as childbirth are women gender roles, but why would chores be tied to only women? These are things that can be done by both parties just as some women can be breadwinners so should it be with other responsibilities!”