I cannot say I am old enough yet to be an authority on women, and I definitely should not be making this statement. It is a pity that at some point, most men give up looking for their perfect women, and settle for whatever is available.
In a way, they are not to blame. There, I said it. And I believe it is true. I do not know if this is because there is no perfect woman, or because the men finally realise that essentially women are all the same.
At the end of the day, most women fall within a certain range of commonality, and it does not really make sense to pretend you are going to get any one different, yet within that range. I do not mean to insult any woman by bundling them and labelling them as “unexceptional”. This is a personal opinion that I have come to acquire with time.
Sure, I know a few exceptional women, but, unfortunately, I am related to them. No, this is not the mummy’s boy in me talking, I am being real. Still, even them, they are not perfect. But the topic is not about how perfect the women in my family are. It is about the women I can date, the women among whom I am supposed to choose a life time partner.
I have dated a few very good women, but none that I can say I felt really comfortable enough to even entertain the thought that she might be the one for me. I do have high standards, but nothing that is unattainable by reasonable standards.
What happened was that after a while, I kind of got used to the girl and “tolerated” her issues. That is how many men fall into traps, and end up with women who they do not even like, and years later, they wonder how on earth they ever even convinced themselves that they loved those women.
Yes, relationship are about tolerance, but we are still human; I will tolerate a woman’s unbecoming behaviour, but it does not mean that I will not notice them. Within a certain limit, most men will let things slide.
As we grow older, instead of actually focusing and narrowing that “tolerance limit”, most men instead widen it. They stop putting in that extra effort to try to know the woman, because they have reached that stage that believes that most, if not all, women are the same. It has happened to me. It reached a point where I did not even really want to get to know the women I was dating because I realised that it often led to uncovering certain things about the woman that damped my sentiments towards her.
That is the stage I am referring to; that point where a man only notices a woman because she is good looking, or he likes her company, but he is no longer interested in what else there is to know about her.
That is why you find a well accomplished man settling for a woman who does not deserve him. I mean how many men do you personally know who are married to women, who inspire the thought “that guy could surely have done better!”? It is because at some point, he gave up, and stopped looking for quality, and instead went for things such as looks.
As if that is not enough, some of the men do not even bother to at least look for a hot-looking woman to settle down with... that could be some compensation for all her other shortcomings.
I am not perfect or flawless for me to be so critical, and to only desire the perfect girl. But, it does not mean I should settle for less. Women can be so disappointing by failing to live up to basic expectations.
This is me writing for the men, because I am a man, and I have had these experiences. I am sure the women have their issues with men, please feel free to bring it to the attention of the men.